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JadeTheAssassin
^_____________^

Age 35, Female

Mrs. DevourerJay

Vancouver

Joined on 4/5/04

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JadeTheAssassin's News

Posted by JadeTheAssassin - June 7th, 2009


Slow Sunday at work, so shitty tips.

Last day working with my friend for a month, so now it's me, my boss, boss' cousin, other coworker, and other guy who can't work more than 1/2 days a week till his finals are done. *sigh*

Guy creepily ogled my ass and legs as I was making his coffee.

On my way home, I saw a guy biking up the street with what appeared to be two dogs of his. I guessed wrong, as they stopped chasing the cyclist and started running towards me, barking their heads off. I froze, not knowing what to do, hoping that someone would hear the dogs. Then one of them circled around me and I -think- nipped my ass, then distanced itself and continued barking. They both looked like they were seriously pissed off, and I was frozen in place.

The owner then called the dogs back. I don't think she saw me, though. I walk by that house almost every day on my way home from work. Definitely not walking down that way anymore, I guess. Not allowed to carry knives/bear spray/mace, so I'm pretty much screwed if I have a coyote/dog/raccoon/homocidal maniac come after me.

You'd wonder why everyone wants me to switch jobs.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 25th, 2009


pedobear jebus

thanks missing :3
JESUS LOVES THE LITTLE CHILLLLLLLLLLDREN

hahahahahahaha lolololol


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 19th, 2009


Ok, so my brothers and I attended a convention of sorts on Saturday, aptly called "Khan Con". What's Khan Con, you say?

It's all about the Star Trek, babeh.

It was all so hilarious--there was the airing of an episode of the animated series (TOS)--The Infinite Vulcan (which was ballfuckingly hilarious in itself), the TOS episode where Khan comes in--Space Seed. There was also the airing of a facepalm-worthy fan-made episode of Next Generation called "Chains of Betrayal. There's a trailer for it, which doesn't do it fucking justice. I can't wait for it to be put up so you can see its AWESOME ACTING AND EDITING SKILLS!1!11!!!!

There was also a poetry contest, a "Klingon Rap-Off" (which had NO klingon), a costume contest, an Orion Slave Girl dance (by a burlesque dancer, methinks), and a trivia contest, as well as a Khan shout-off.

Then we watched Wrath of Khan, which was beyond AWESOME on a cinema screen. We all clapped when Kirk shouted his iconic phrase, and it was just an awesome time all round. Couldn't stay to see the new movie, but I saw it tonight and it was OMFGSOAWESOMEFUCKYESSSSSSSSSSSSS.

:D

I want to see it again.

Now.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 15th, 2009


My mum and I laughed.

More like I shat bricks and told her.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 13th, 2009


WIP

Weeeee


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 6th, 2009


I was walking to the bus stop on the way to work this morning. It had rained during the night, and it was fairly warm for 5AM, and I could smell the sweetest fragrance.

It smelled of roses mixed with dew, and it was absolutely heavenly. The breeze blew it my way, and I sniffed at the air, and all felt right.

Until I slammed the cooler door on my thumb.

OH WELL.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - May 3rd, 2009


Yeah.

He also doesn't approve of me and my brothers laughing at people getting hurt on Youtube, or that I spend lots of time on here, or I talk about my dick, if my trousers happen to have slid down a bit, if my tops are low, and a whole slew of things.

I disappoint him with my failures and flaws.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - April 29th, 2009


My chest is full of lead.

My heart's like a slow-turning, rusty gear.

My brain's like an overheated engine.

I feel like the tinman.


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - April 22nd, 2009


Weee, one of the longer pieces I've done.

Worth redoing her head and such over. :D

BatGirl


Posted by JadeTheAssassin - April 21st, 2009


trying different shading method.

SHINY LATEX SUIT DO WANT

wip

Edit: SHE DOESN'T HAVE A PENIS HEAD ANYMORE YAYYY

weeee batgirl